If you only knew…..

If you only knew…..

Let’s take a moment and fill in that blank. 

If you only knew…. what I’ve been through in the last week.

If you only knew… where I started out.

If you only knew… what I witnessed when I was a child.

These are all statements that we either say in our head or out loud when confronted with someone who questions us, doubts our ability or even offers up some constructive criticism.

Recently I saw on a social media site that many women find it difficult to receive an honest compliment. While they may say thank you to the person, deep down inside they are thinking, ‘NO! I’m not THAT! I’m not the person you think I am, I don’t deserve that kind word! Please stop saying that!’

But why? Why do some folks find it difficult to receive a kind word from someone?

Other than the fact that it’s easy to listen to the negative self talk that plays like an unending loop our heads, I think there is one underlying factor:

We are the only ones who know everything that we’ve done, everything we are thinking, our selfish intentions, our manipulative mind and our self-seeking motives.  No one (except God) knows what’s going on in our head.  And honestly, sometimes we don’t know either, but that’s a different blog for a different day.

So, when someone comes along and pays us a compliment, all we can think is, ‘Are you kidding? You have no idea that I was just critiquing your entire outfit thirty seconds before you walked up here.’ 

Can I get a witness? Am I alone here?

Add into that a critical parent or an abusive boss or a manipulative spouse and you have a woman (or man) who has a hard time believing anything nice about themselves.  It’s easy to believe the bad and oh so difficult to believe the good stuff about us.

But remember, others don’t see all that ugliness that you see and feel inside.  People like offering you a genuine word of encouragement. Take it. Soak it up.  Use it to propel you forward into your next project or getting through your next difficult circumstance.

And when you receive the compliment, kindly thank the person for offering you encouragement. They want to bless you, let them. When you refuse or sidestep a compliment, It’s like someone offering you a cold beverage on a really hot day and throwing it back in their face.