Ringside on a Friday Afternoon

On a Friday afternoon at the state fair, I typed up show results and posted photos of a show that was happening in front of me at the Farmer’s Coliseum in downtown Indianapolis.  Four rings of cattle were on exhibition while clerks, queens and announcers kept the pace of the show moving forward for spectators enjoying a vanilla shake and a hot grilled cheese.

On one side of me was a young woman who had just moved back from Iowa and was telling me about her entrepreneurial idea of opening a western wear boutique, behind me sat a former state officer for Indiana FFA and was headed to Purdue to major in ag communications with a desire to get into ag broadcasting. And on my left-hand side was my youngest son who was just along for the fun and giggles. He was flanked by the Indiana Holstein Queen who hailed from Turtle Town, USA, otherwise known as Churubusco, Indiana—don’t think there weren’t some great stories about turtle races throughout the day.

On that same Friday afternoon, 476 miles west, my daughter was sitting ringside covering the Iowa State Fair Holstein show. The girl who went off to college and said she would never work in the ag industry was taking photos of cows and posting show results while visiting with acquaintances turned life-long friends because she’s been going to this state fair with me for nearly 10 years.

When these two kids were 6 and 8, they would tag along with me to cover events at local county fairs.  Whether it was a livestock auction or a show, they were always in search of the cheapest corndog on the grounds and then hit the local dairy producers ice cream stand.  We couldn’t leave the fair without going through the commercial building to pick up all the free pens, candy, chip clips and yard sticks.

Now in their 20s, they both have a career, live on their own and are enjoying the life God has put before them. Never in my wildest dreams did I think twenty years later, we would still be going to the fair, enjoying grilled cheese and vanilla shakes, sitting ringside at a show.  But here we are, two of us in Indy and the other in Des Moines and I wouldn’t have it any other way. 

A Community of Chaos

Visiting with my oldest son over coffee he said, “I have a question for you.”  Whenever he says that I always brace myself because it’s usually a question that involves lots of thought and sometimes I have no idea how to answer him.

He asked, “When you get together with your lady’s group, do you complain about your husbands?” I said, “Sometimes.”

Then he asked, “And when you do complain, you all pile on, right?”

It was a great opportunity to explain to him how the healthy support of other women can make the difference between a vibrant family life and insanity.

The ladies I meet with week after week not only support each other, but we support each other’s spouses, kids, grandkids and parents.  I can’t count the number of times I was spitting nails about something that happened earlier in the day and recounted the circumstance in great detail waiting for everyone to fly to my defense only to have them point me right back to the positive, the good and the hopeful aspects of my marriage.  While I wanted everyone to commiserate, they stepped back, wrapped their arms around my family and squeezed us tight with prayer.

Not only did they not pile on, they recounted my husband’s attributes and shed light on his perspective.  They showed me the other side of the argument and helped me consider all sides of the situation. Sometimes they laughed.  Sometimes they shared their own similar stories, but never did they add to my frustration by layering on more blame and exasperation.

My son was astounded.  He said he had never seen that kind of thing in his generation of women. I added that I learned a long time ago that when you have a friend who is taking your side and finding more cause for your argument, you need to find a new friend because she will be the first one to try to steal your husband away.

Finding a group of women who will love your family as much as they love you is a gift that will not only  keep your sanity in an insane world, but will calm the storms when the waves of family life come crashing down in a moment’s notice.  We were created for community, a community that loves and supports your entire family filled with the chaos of life.  

A Taste of Americana

 On a hot day in July, I sat ringside at the Elkhart County Fair in Goshen, Indiana and watched the arena fill up with spectators as the 4-H dairy show began.  We have been covering their 4-H show for a few years now and I always look forward to it.  There’s just something about a county fair that makes everyone feel like the world is right.  Whether it’s the parents running around trying to wrangle their kids to the right ring, or grandparents smiling proudly in the stands, a county fair is one week out of the year that makes sense to everyone.

And if you listen closely, you’ll hear the idle chatter from folks who have lived in the county for decades. These people have been coming to the county fair for years and now they are enjoying the third and fourth generation of family 4-Her’s.  Old farmers, relatives, local businessmen, they all like to stand at the rail and watch the show. For eight hours I sat at the table and listened to people come, lean over the railing, watch the show and chat about life. No matter where you go, or what’s in the ring, I guarantee you will hear the same conversation, over and over and over.  Here are my top five tidbits you’ll hear from the railbirds.

1.       Did you hear Bill sold his farm? Yeah, I heard it went for $10,000 an acre.  That’s a boatload of money, not sure anyone can make that cash flow. That’s 100-bushel ground at best. Charlie’s been after that farm for years. That dirt’s never seen red equipment on it.

2.       What’s that cow? Did Bob breed her or did he buy her? I don’t remember her the last time I was at his place.  Yeah, he probably bought her just for this show, you know how he hates to lose to Jim. One of these days Jim’s gonna win and Bob ain’t gonna like that.  What’d he pay for her?

3.       Got second cuttin’ done yet?  I was gonna mow last week, but I knew all my help would be out here to the fair, so I figured I’d wait until we got this over with.  I’ll be glad when these kids outgrow 4-H.

4.       How much rain did you get? We got an inch and two tenths. It was nice, but we sure could use a little shower. The corn on that sandy ground is about to start rolling up….I don’t want to have to start the irrigation, but I guess I’ll have to if we don’t get a little more rain pretty soon.

5.       Is that John’s nephew? How is he old enough to be in 4-H? It seems like they just got married yesterday.  Whatever happened to Junior’s boy? He married the youngest Smith girl, and didn’t they have kids right away? I always thought she and the Jones boy would get married, but I guess they split right after high school.  That’s a shame, they could’ve had the whole farm.

Tell me you haven’t heard those conversations.  Or maybe you heard your own voice somewhere in there. Whatever is said, and whoever is saying it, this kind of chatter is the essence of people who have settled the land, carved out a living and love their country. This little taste of Americana was raised on hard work, based on deep values and continues to live by the moral compass instilled by our Creator. And life doesn’t get any sweeter than that.